


You're Sure I'm Real?

by MaryRosalea



Series: Demons and Vampires and Witches...Oh My! [1]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Supernatural
Genre: Crazy Buffy Summers, Crazy Sam Winchester, F/M, Inspired by Twist and Shout - gabriel & standbyme, M/M, Psychologists & Psychiatrists
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-22
Updated: 2017-03-03
Packaged: 2018-05-15 13:59:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5787847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaryRosalea/pseuds/MaryRosalea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Instead of Buffy being poisoned in "Normal Again" something happened to trigger her actually going crazy and being checked into an asylum. But guess who else is there? A certain demon hunter that keeps insisting to her that she is in fact the Slayer, no matter what her doctors say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The New Girl in Town

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, this is obviously AU since it's crossover, but it's a little more than that. I saw this awesome gifset on tumblr about what would happen if Buffy and Sam met while they were both locked away…and this is what happened. 
> 
> Also, I started this story a very long time ago and have recently picked it back up. When I originally started it, it was going to strictly be a Spuffy story. Well guess what? I have since then become a Destiel fan, so it has wormed its way into this fic as well! 
> 
> Italics are Lucy talking to Sam. 
> 
> I have a few chapters of this story already written and will be posting a chapter a day until I catch up to what I have written, then it'll trickle down to a chapter a week until I finally finish it.

"Winchester!"

Sam looked up as he heard the orderly, Mark call his name.

"You got a new roommate." Mark announced as he practically dragged a short girl with long blond hair all around her face in by the arm.

"Little odd to room me with a chick isn't it?" Sam asked as he watched his new roommate run instantly to the corner where she balled up as if trying to disappear into the wall.

"Yeah, well, we got a little bit of an over-crowding issue as of late. So we decided that since you guys have pretty much the same case we could just put you two together and not have to worry about you hurting each other." Mark explained.

He didn't mind Sam. He didn't really think he belonged in here. But the kid insisted that he hunted demons and that he had conversations with Lucifer himself. You'd never guess it if you were having a normal conversation with the guy, but if the conversation turned to anything of a supernatural nature, out came the bird from the cuckoo's nest. In all honesty, if the kid took some prescription schizophrenia medication he could probably be a fully functioning member of society. Heck, maybe he could even go back to Stanford Law like he had mentioned.

"What do you mean we have the same case?" Sam asked instantly curious.

"She thinks she kills demons, too. No talk of talking to the big man yet. Guess that makes you special, Sammy." Mark winked at him.

"Don't call me 'Sammy'," Sam snapped, forgetting momentarily about the fact that Mark just told him that this girl was a hunter.

"Hey, my bad," Mark stepped back with his hands up in the air in surrender. He didn't see Sam snap that often. Come to think of it, he'd never seen Sam snap out of anger.

"Sorry, it's just," Sam hesitated and then got a pained look in his eye. "My brother called me 'Sammy'."

"Got it," Mark nodded. "Alright, well I'm gonna go. You guys get to know each other. My shift is over, see you tomorrow, Sam."

"See ya, Mark," Sam nodded as the orderly left.

He studied the girl. If Lucifer wasn't constantly bugging her, what had made her snap? Maybe she was recently possessed and she had trouble coping with what the demon had done with her body. Sam had been there, but he had gotten through it with Dean's help. This girl was practically catatonic. Mark had mentioned that she was a hunter. Maybe something got a hold of her and made her like this on purpose.

_Oh well, Sammy, only one way to find out._

"Hey," Sam said gently.

She made an almost imperceptible move to acknowledge that she'd heard him.

"My name's Sam," he tried again, this time moving closer to her and crouching in front of her to get eye level. "I guess we're gonna be roomies for awhile."

Suddenly she got a scared look on her face and started to back even further into the corner. "Roommate. Demon. Roommate's a demon," she muttered to herself. "Roommate from Hell."

"No, no, no," Sam rushed to assure her. "I'm not a demon, I'm human. In fact, I'm a hunter, like you."

"Hunter?" She looked up at him strangely.

"Yeah," he nodded, glad she had calmed down. "Me and my brother, Dean, we're demon hunters."

"No," she shook her head. "Demons not real." The shaking of her head got so intense that Sam thought that she was about to have a panic attack.

"Is that what they told you when you got here? Demons aren't real and that you're just delusional?" Sam asked.

She calmed back down and simply nodded at him, tilting her head as if interested to see what else he had to say.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Sam whispered conspiratorially to her.

She nodded again. "I'm good at secrets."

"The doctors here? They don't know the truth. The demons are real. You and I? We know better, and we hunt them to keep these people safe. Safe from what lives in the dark. What goes bump in the night." Sam told her as if telling a child about super heroes. Whatever demon had gotten a hold of this girl had really done a number on her head. He wished he could just pray to Castiel as soon as he got out of here to come and heal her so she could get back to her life. This was no way for any respectable hunter to waste away.

"The demons are real?" She asked wide-eyed. "The vampires are real?"

Sam nodded, excited he was finally getting through to her. "Yeah. Vampires, is that what you specialize in? What you hunt the most?" He held his breath for a second; he really didn't need another Gordon on his hands right now.

Again she nodded. "Slay vampires."

Sam's brow furrowed as he focused on what she said. 'Slay vampires'. Not hunt, or waste, or kill, but slay. Why did that sound so familiar to him? It was itching in the back of his head that he had read about something like that before.

"You never told me your name," Sam said, pushing his previous thoughts to the side.

"Buffy. Buffy Summers." She almost whispered, as if she was confused by her own name.

That name sounded familiar, too. Where the heck had he heard that name? Then it hit him.

Sam's new roommate, was the Slayer.


	2. I'll Keep You My Dirty Little Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, Sam figured out the big secret, his roommate is the Slayer. 
> 
> So what happens now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! How are you liking it so far?
> 
> Except for Sam's little bitty flashback in the first paragraph, italics are Lucifer. By the way! This is not a Sam/Buffy pairing story, and in MY world, Buffy and Spike are actually together, deal with it. Also, I don't really care about the timelines of either show, just pretend that this is all happening right now. Following canon is fun, but this is an AU, didn't you know that?
> 
> And yes, I am fully aware of all the lore on SPN, and trust me, I love it. However, for the purposes of this show, Buffyverse vamp lore rules supreme. That is all. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"You're the Slayer?" Sam asked in shock.  
  
Sam had read stories about the Slayer when he was young and his father made him study vampires for a case he had. He was certain at the time that he read it that the Slayer was a myth. I mean come on, if there was a hunter out there that was gifted with superhuman strength, then she should be able to waste everything in sight. Especially when there was a new one called the second the previous one died. He had also asked Dean about it when he first read it. _Of course it's fake, Sammie. If there were a Super Hunter like that, why would they all be chicks? She'd probably be fun in the sack though—all those muscles. ___  
  
"Slayer," she said nodding. Then all of a sudden she started shaking her head violently. "No, slaying isn't real. Nothing's real, Dawnie, Spike, Willow, nothing."  
  
_"This one is more sack of hammers than you, Sam," ___Lucifer said as the girl only got more upset.  
  
Sam shook his head to try to cancel Lucifer out while he tried to calm Buffy down.  
  
"Is that your family? Is Spike your dog?" Sam asked trying to get her back into the conversation.  
  
She giggled at that. "No, dogboy is Oz. But he's gone. Spike is…boyfriend?" She said the last part as if she was asking Sam for confirmation.  
  
_"Aww, if she's already taken that means your hero act won't win you a kiss this time. Though…with a name like Spike you might be a step up." ___Lucifer continued to taunt him.  
  
"Boyfriend? That's good. Can we call him? Let him know where you are? I'm guessing you were found and brought here like I was." He said. If he could get a hold of someone in her life that wasn't as out of it as…well either of them, then they could tell him what happened to her and they could try to get her back to normal.  
  
She only seemed to look more confused as he kept talking. "No, no phone at the crypt. Doesn't need a phone, he always knows when I need him to show up. Because it's a dream, not real." As she said 'not real' she hit her head as if she was trying to pound the point into her head.  
  
"Crypt?" Sam looked at her in confusion. "Is Spike dead?"  
  
She looked at him as if he was stupid. "Well, duh!"  
  
_"Ooh, might have a shot with Wonder Woman after all." ___  
  
"All vampires are dead. I thought you said you hunted demons, too. Are you new at this?" She continued to look at him incredulously.  
  
"You're boyfriend's a vampire?" Sam asked once he shook himself out of shock.  
  
_"A vampire and a vampire Slayer—in love. Now why is it that when I try to write poetry it never comes out near that good?" ___  
Buffy shrugged, "Not even the first one. But he's kinda prettier. And way more fun in bed." Her eyebrows furrowed again. "But that's wrong. I can't feel that way. He doesn't have a soul," she shook her head again. "No, he's not even real!"  
  
_"And we're back again." ___  
  
Sam grabbed a hold of her arms to try to bring her back to the right track. "Hey, hey, Buffy." He smiled when she looked up into his eyes. "It's ok. Spike is real. All vampires are real. Now please, is there anyone's phone number that we can call for someone to come help you?"  
  
She looked as if she was in deep thought for a long time, then she shook her head. "Sunnydale's not real, so the numbers aren't real. I don't remember my phone number in LA." The last part she said looking up at Sam like she was a lost, little child.  
  
"Ok, that's fine. Sunnydale, is that where you live now?" Sam asked her. He knew that whatever was messing with her mind had given her a serious case of not being able to distinguish reality and fake, he could definitely relate to that. But if whatever it was made her think that vampires and monsters weren't real, then maybe most of what she assumed wasn't real, really was.  
  
She nodded her head. "In my mind. That's the town where the vampires are real. And my sister and Watcher are real there. But they aren't really real, or they'd be here now. Right?" She looked up at him like a small child would when asking her father a question.  
  
_"Well, Sammy, if Coco Puffs wasn't in love with the Fang, she'd be perfect for you. You both have the same trouble with reality, ain't that a kick in the head?" ___  
  
Sam angrily shook his head at Lucifer's ramblings and looked back to Buffy. "Who told you none of it was real?"  
  
She concentrated before she answered. "The doctors, and my parents. They said I got scared and ran away inside my mind and made up my own little special world—Sunnydale."  
  
Sam decided to try a new tactic with her. "Well, how about we make a deal?"  
  
"What?" She asked excitedly.   
  
"We can pretend for the doctors and everybody else, that we believe what they say. But when we're alone in here, we can talk about the vampires, monsters, and Sunnydale like that's the real world. Ok?" He asked. He hoped that he could get her to feel more easy about talking about her life in Sunnydale without having to worry about if it was real or not. Then he could get solid information that he could send Dean to look into so that they could find her family and make her better.  
  
She thought for a long time before she responded to him. "Like, storytime? We tell stories about the monsters to each other?" She asked tentatively.  
  
"Exactly like storytime." Sam replied smiling.  
  
She nodded her head happily to that. "Ok, deal!"  
  
"Great! You go first, tell me all about how you became the Slayer and living in Sunnydale." Sam encouraged. If she asked, he'd start telling his own life story, but for now he would get as much from her as she'd allow.  
  
Lucifer hopped up from where he had been sitting on the table and sat cross-legged in between Buffy and Sam, looking back and forth between the two of them. _"Ooh, I love stories. But I always end up being the bad guy. Don't make the bad guy, okay, Sam? I can't wait to hear how the precious Slayer has fallen for multiple vampires." ___  
  
"Well, it all started when I was fifteen…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and Kudos feed my soul! Don't you want me soul happy? Because Joss and Jeremy don't.


	3. On the Road Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so we're still not on to the Sam crazy, but it'll happen, I just needed to get the story rolling. So I took some liberties that you'll notice, but guess what? It's a crossover fanfic, and I'm the author so I do what I want! 
> 
> Dean meets Buffy. 
> 
> We get a glimpse of Spike in good ol' Sunnyhell.
> 
> Dean goes to the Hellmouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, italics are Lucifer in Sam's head.

"Yo, Sammy," Dean called as he walked into his brother's room at the hospital. However, he was not expecting to see the girl that was in the room. He looked back from the number of the room back to the girl. "Uh, sorry, must have the wrong room, I was looking for Sam."  
  
Just then Sam came up behind Dean. "Hey, Dean, I see you met Buffy."  
  
"Uh, yea, sort of," Dean replied confused. "Glad to see you're making friends, Sammy."  
  
"Well, she's my roommate." Sam said as he sat down on his bed leaving room for Dean to sit beside him while they both faced Buffy on hers.  
  
"Roommate? I didn't realize they roomed co-ed." Dean replied even more confused.  
  
"They don't normally, but there's been some overcrowding, and me and Buffy have some of the same 'problems'." Sam explained.  
  
Dean looked from Buffy, who had still yet to do more than stare at him, back to Sam. "And by same problems, you mean?"  
  
"She's a hunter, Dean." Sam deadpanned, hoping his brother would have just caught on to his subtlety.  
  
"Cool," Dean nodded. "So where you from, sweetcheeks? And what landed ya in here? If you don't mind my askin'."  
  
"Um…originally LA, but," Buffy looked unsurely at Sam. Sam gave her a nod of reassurance, letting her know she could be honest with Dean. "I've been living in Sunnydale for the last six years."  
  
"Sunnydale, California?" He looked to Sam. "Isn't that where one of the Hell gates is?"  
  
Sam nodded. "Yea, but she calls it a Hellmouth."  
  
"And I don't know how I ended up here." Buffy said as an answer to Dean's earlier question.  
  
"She stays pretty busy just living on the Hellmouth so she just patrols the town every night." Sam started to explain. "The last thing she remembers was that she had had a fight with her boyfriend while out on patrol and then nothing."  
  
_You forgot to mention the part that the boyfriend's one of the hunted kind, Sam. ___  
  
"So you got family out there looking for you? That's great. We'll just find them and get you back home to the people you love." Dean summarized.  
  
"Love, that's what Spike calls me," she said with a gentle smile. Then all of a sudden she had another panic attack as she started to lose her grasp. "No! No, no, no! He doesn't call me that, because he's not real. None of it is real! No Sunnydale! No vampires! No Spike!"  
  
_Here we go again. ___  
  
In a flash Sam was on his knees in front of her as Dean watched on, "Hey, hey, hey. Calm down. Everything's fine, and everything is real. Spike is very real, and we'll get you to him alright? See?" Sam said as he gently grabbed Buffy's arm to show her the bracelet Spike had gotten her for her birthday. "The bracelet's real, so he is."  
  
Dean just watched the entire scene play out. He was impressed with how well Sam was able to deal with the situation. He was also pretty pleased that he used the same tactic that Dean tried to use on him to convince him that he wasn’t still in the pit with Lucifer by grasping something he knew was real.  
  
Buffy nodded, then looked from Sam to Dean. "I wanna go home."  
  
Dean nodded at her, "Then that's where you're going. I'll head out to Sunnydale from here and be back before you know it."  
  
"Why are you helping me?" Buffy asked instead of thanking him. "Sam said you didn't even think I was real."  
  
"What are you…" Dean started but was interrupted by Sam.  
  
"Uh, Dean…"  
  
Well Sammy, time to come clean.  
  
"There's one more thing you should know." Dean looked at him expectantly. "She's the Vampire Slayer."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What do you mean 'gone'?" Spike asked.  
  
Just that, she's gone. She never came home from patrol last night." Xander explained. "This was literally the last place we wanted to look."  
  
"Maybe she's just invisible again, yeah? We'll just find her and make her seeable again." Spike said, trying to keep himself from thinking the worst.  
  
Xander shook his head. "Willow saw Warren this afternoon and gave him a truth spell. Told us he used some weird demon with a funny name to transport her somewhere."  
  
"Transported? Did he say where?"  
  
"If he had, why would I be looking?" Xander rolled his eyes. "One of his partners in crime zapped him out of the place before he had a chance to answer us."  
  
"Can't the wiccas do a locating spell on the Slayer?" Spike asked earnestly.  
  
"Tried, whatever they did when they took her, they're covering their tracks pretty well." Xander answered.  
  
"Well she can't just vanish!"  
  
Spike actually was panicking now. He knew that no matter where she was she had to be ok. He would have felt it if something terrible had happened to her, wouldn't he? He instantly regretted that the last time he had seen her that they had been fighting, and it should have been a happy night for him! She had come to tell him that she wanted to get back together with him! She had been cleaning her room and had finally opened the present he had gotten her for her birthday—a bracelet, his mom's bracelet, with the inscription "Anne" on it.  
  
He couldn't believe his ears when she admitted to him that she believed that what he felt for her was love and not just obsession. She apologized again to him for the way she had treated him during their first go around. She wanted to really try to make it work this time. Then he had to go and bollix it up.  
  
He had asked if she was going to tell her friends about them this time. In his mind that was the final test. If she really wanted it to work, then why hide it from her friends? But she told him she wanted to wait, that she wanted to make sure they could actually make it for a while before she told them. She had tried to give him a consolation by telling him that Tara already knew about them and that she was willing to tell Dawn, but she wanted to keep it from Willow and Xander still.  
  
He didn't even know why that had irritated him so much, but it did. Hence, the fight. He should have been happy with what she was willing to give him at the time instead of being his normal selfish self. Who knows what was happening to her right now, and the last things he had said to her had been in anger. If something had truly happened to her, he would never forgive himself.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"The Vampire Slayer?" Dean asked incredulously. "The one you used to read stories about as a kid?"  
  
"We've met normal fairy tales," Sam entreated. "Why can't we meet the hunter fairy tale?"  
  
Dean nodded his concession. "Okay, fine, let's say I believe you, and she really is the Slayer. That just leaves us with more questions as to how she ended up here. Who or what did she piss off enough to put her in this state and take her so far from home?"  
  
"All excellent questions that you can try to figure out with her friends when you go to Sunnydale. Meanwhile, I’ll stay here and see if I can find any clues as to why she was sent here specifically." Sam said.  
  
"I'm just gonna go and pump her friends for information?" Dean asked.  
  
"What else would you pump them for," Buffy mumbled to herself and then giggled.  
  
"And what would make them believe that I'm on their side and not the one that took her in the first place?" Dean offered.  
  
"Spray some holy water on yourself." Sam explained.  
  
"And if they don't believe it's real holy water?" Dean lifted his brow in question.  
  
"Splash it on Spike," Buffy smirked, then she looked slightly worried. "Just don't tell him it was my idea, he's already mad at me."  
  
"Spike? Your boyfriend? He's a demon?' Dean asked, not believing there was a way to be more shocked in this conversation.  
  
_Ruh-roh, tell big brother who he's really going to see, Sammy boy. ___  
  
"He's a vampire," Sam supplied weakly.  
  
Dean rolled his eyes and pointed at Sam. "I swear to God, Sammy, if my life gets any weirder after this, then I'm the next one who gets to take a vacation in a loony bin, got it?"  
  
Sam just smiled. "Got it, jerk."  
  
"Bitch."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
A few nights later, Spike was sitting on the couch with Dawn. He figured that she would appreciate the company and protection what with the Slayer missing and Willow's ever absentness at home. He had finally decided to tell Dawn what had been going on between him and Buffy.  
  
"So you guys, are really together?" Dawn asked with hope filling her eyes.  
  
"Only if we ever get her back here so I can apologize for being such a wanker." Spike said almost miserably.  
  
Dawn's nose scrunched up in the same way Buffy's did that Spike loved. "Ew, Spike, that's gross."  
  
Just then the doorbell rang. "That's weird," Dawn said. "The Scoobies would have just walked in. Who'd be ringing the bell?"  
  
"You stay here, and I'll go check." Spike ordered.  
  
When Spike answered the door he was met with a brunette man about the same height as him, a quick sniff indicating he was human. "Can I help you, mate?"  
  
"Uh, you Spike?" the man asked.  
  
"Last time I checked, and you are?" Spike asked cautiously, he was in trouble if things went south. Of course, he'd protect Dawn if need be, but it'd give him a hell of a migraine afterwards.  
  
"Name's Dean. And I know where Buffy is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos make me happy!!


	4. Dancing With Myself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Buffy bond.
> 
> Dean and Spike bond. 
> 
> Then there's a not so new face that comes around!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, I know that I don't update this as often as I said I would and I'm sorry but my laptop hates me sometimes and I can only do this while I'm at school in between classes. 
> 
> Also, until this point I was revived hiatus story of mine that I hadn't updated in a while. As of right now all material is newly written, so updates might even be slower. 
> 
> Anyway, here's the new chapter. Enjoy.

Buffy was practically buzzing with electricity the rest of the week. It made Sam happy to see her so hopeful. She was basically dancing constantly. 

“So Dean is really bringing Spike here?” she asked for the millionth time, though Sam didn’t mind. Given whatever spell she had been under, it was understandable for her to have trust issues. 

“Yes,” Sam smiled. “They are on their way now. Your friend, Willow, found an article online of someone who might be able to help both of us. They’re going to stop and pick him up and then they’ll be straight here.” Sam had been able to make a phone call to Dean yesterday in order to learn all of this information. Buffy didn’t have any phone privileges yet, so she would just have to wait until she saw Spike to speak to him--something neither of them were happy about. The only thing that was a drawback was that due to Spike’s sun allergy the two could only travel by night. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_“On the floor of Tokyo or down in London town to go go…” ___

“Rise and shine, Fang boy!” Dean yelled into the motel room to get Spike up for another night of driving. They were only about an hour away from where that faith healer lived which was conveniently only three hours from the hospital Sam and Buffy were staying. With luck they would be done with all of this madness by morning and Sam and Dean could take Spike and Buffy home, and they could get back to worrying about Leviathans.

“Billy Idol?” Spike scoffed. “Really?”

Dean smirked. “Thought you’d like it. Since you admire him so much.” Dean joked as they stepped outside. 

“For the record,” Spike admonished as he jumped into the passenger seat of the car. “He stole this look from me.”

Dean looked at him in disbelief. “I you say so.” There was a moment of silence before Dean spoke again. “So, you ready to see your girl again?”

“Christ, yes,” Spike replied emphatically. “The night she disappeared we had gotten in this stupid fight. All my fault, of course. Then she went missing, and I had been beside myself with worry until you showed up.”

Dean nodded, “what did you fight about?”

Spike smirked. “Well, if you haven’t noticed, I’m not exactly the most savory of characters. So, the first time me and Buffy were together--we weren’t exactly together. But I’ve loved her for bloody ever, so I took what I could get. She broke up with me. That night, we got back together, but she wanted to keep it from some of her friends. They’re not exactly my biggest fans. Now that I’ve had time to think about it, I understand completely. But I was so hot-headed at the time, that I was mad, thinking it meant she didn’t really care about me. Starting the whole cycle over again.” He shook his head as he went silent.

“I get that, though,” Dean jumped in. “From both sides. How it feels to BE the dark secret and being the one WITH a dark secret. And honestly, man, maybe you did go about the fight the wrong way. But secrets are always bad in relationships. They’ll always backfire.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” Spike nodded. “That’s why I got so upset. The fact we were keeping it a secret was one of the problems we had with the first go. But her heart wasn’t in it last time like it is now. Shoulda took my crumb.”

“Well, you can kiss and makeup when you see her. In the meantime, let’s go get this miracle worker.” Dean said as he pulled up to the house of their destination. 

It looked like a normal Victorian style house--wholesome enough. But both of these men knew better than to take things on appearance. 

When they went to knock on the door they noticed it was already slightly opened. Dean peeked in the window and could see a woman tied up inside. He motioned Spike to look and then entered the house, while Spike stayed outside. 

As he entered the room, he noticed the woman was alone, so Dean immediately went to untie her. 

“Ma’am, you mind inviting my friend over there, inside?” Dean asked, really wanting Spike as backup for when whoever had tied her up came back. 

“Of course,” she said as soon as Dean removed the tie from her mouth. “Please, come in! You two saved my life!”

As soon as Spike could cross the threshold, he began assessing the situation, looking for whoever did the tying. 

“You okay?” Dean asked as he took the wrapping from the woman’s arms, she nodded. “Do you know who did this to you?” 

She shook her head. “I have no idea, but there was something wrong with his eyes.”

“Like this?” Spike offered as he switched into gameface. 

Dean looked at him oddly as the woman once again shook her head. “That never gets less disturbing.”

Spike shrugged.

“More like this,” they all turned as they heard a new voice enter the room. Sure enough they were looking at the black eyes of a demon. He smiled when he saw them. “My, my, Dean Winchester and William the Bloody. Not only was I not expecting you, but I really wasn’t expecting you _together __.”_

Dean shrugged, “Well we seem to have a common goal.”

“Interesting,” the demon mused. “Would you like to hear my goal?”

Dean smirked in amusement, was this guy really about to do the villain monologue? “Sure.”

“Well there was this very distinct signature coming from this house. One you might be interested in, Dean.” The demon explained as he moved further into the room. 

“Is that right?” Dean egged him on, trying to get more information. 

“Mutual friend of ours. Actually, come to think of it, that’s probably why you’re here. But he wasn’t here when I showed up.” He said as he snuck behind the woman and grabbed her neck. “So, I took this little thing hoping he’d show up.” 

Dean and Spike both reared back for battle. But before either of them could make a move, the demon started burning from the inside, until he fell down and died. 

“What the,” Dean mumbled. 

“What was wrong with that man’s face?” Another voiced appeared in the room. Spike and the woman turned to the voice. The woman ran towards it. But Dean couldn’t move. He was frozen.

He knew that voice. But it couldn’t be.

“Who would you be then?” Dean heard Spike ask. 

“My name is Emmanuel,” the new voice said. 

Dean whipped around in shock because those facts didn’t add up. But sure enough, he was right. Standing in front of him with his arms around the woman...was Castiel. 

Except...there was no recognition in his eyes. 

He had no idea who Dean was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said this story was going to turn into Destiel as well? Did you see Dean's reaction just now? Did ya see it?!
> 
> Comments and kudos, because now Dean's heart is broken.


	5. Welcome to My Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More bonding of Buffy and Sam.
> 
> More bonding of Dean and Spike. 
> 
> A creepy doctor.
> 
> An amnesiac angel. 
> 
> All sorts of fun!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so obviously things are going to go different than the episode, because I said so!
> 
> This is where the Destiel starts, enter at your own risk.
> 
> I believe in a theory of my friend's that Cas had Dean in heaven for a while before he was resurrected. 
> 
> Remember italics are Lucifer.

“I’ve gotta tell you, Sam, it is quite difficult to justify keeping you here.” Dr. Eli Gregory said with his hands folded in his lap. 

It was almost the end of Sam’s private therapy session for the day when Dr. Gregory surprised him with this statement. Dr. Gregory was an older, black gentleman, average build, salt and pepper hair, clean-shaven. He wore a suit and tie every day, but he was very laid back. He was probably the most popular shrink among the patients and most others were jealous of Sam and Buffy for both getting him. However, there was something about him that put Sam on edge. Maybe it was just part of Sam’s paranoia. It was a too-good-to-be-true type feeling. 

“What do you mean?” Sam asked the doctor, truly puzzled. 

“Well, you have made tremendous improvements during your time here,” Dr. Gregory explained. “It’s especially evident with your friendship with Ms. Summers. She was practically catatonic when she arrived here, but her friendship with you has made her open up in new ways during private sessions. She is still slightly hesitant in group, but regardless, she might even become stable enough to leave soon as well.”

Sam was glad to hear from a third party that Buffy was improving because of him, but at the same time, he was quite confused as to why the doctor was sharing in such detail. Wasn’t this infringing on some confidentiality standards? He decided to brush it off for now. 

“Well, that’s awesome. I’m glad she’s getting better,” Sam started. “But what does that have to do with my case?”

“Everything,” the doctor shrugged. “The fact that you have helped her so tremendously means there is no way you are a danger to others.”

_I have a few friends that would beg to differ. ___

“But I’m still hallucinating,” Sam reminded him, not that he really understood how he could forget. 

Dr. Gregory nodded. “I understand that, but I do believe that once we finally deal with that, hopefully by finding a medication that completely eliminates them, I see no reason why we can’t send you back into the world as a fully functioning member of society. Unless the hallucinations escalate again, you are not currently a danger to yourself or anyone else.”

_But, Sammy! I don’t wanna go. And if you think that some silly pill is gonna get rid of me, you’ve got another thing coming. ___

Sam shook his head at Lucifer for what seemed like the millionth time. “I don’t know how well that will work out. But I guess there’s no harm in trying. What have I got to lose?”

_Your mind! Oops, too late. ___

“Well, I’ve got one more medication I want to try on you,” Dr. Gregory said. “You can start on it tomorrow. But for now, our time is up.”

Sam nodded.”Ok, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Sam, can you send Buffy in please?”

“Of course.”

Buffy jumped up as soon as he walked out the door. “Hey, Sam! How was your session?”

“It was good,” Sam said, furrowing his brow in amusement at her. “What’s got you so excited?”

“It’s my last session!” She almost squealed. “Spike and your brother are going to be here tonight and Spike will take me home.” Her Her smile was infectious. Then, suddenly it was gone. “But I gotta pretend none of that is happening, huh?”

“Yeah,” Sam agreed. “Doc said he thought you were getting better. Last thing we need is him thinking you’ve had a setback.”

Buffy nodded. “Okay, see you later, Sam.”

Sam waved goodbye to her. He was about to walk away when he heard through the door as Buffy greeted...her parents? Sam glanced in the window of the door as he saw her hugging thin air. Dr. Gregory was simply sitting to the side smiling. 

_Why can’t you hug me like that, Sammy? ___

Well, this was going to be something to look into later. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, what you’re saying,” Emmanuel...no _Castiel ___tried to make sense of what Dean was saying. “Is that I am not simply a healer, but an angel?”

Dean nodded from his perch on the hood of his car. They were outside the hospital grounds. It was dark, but they were waiting for shift change before they bombarded the hospital. Spike was leaning against the hood beside Dean, while Cas paced in front of them. 

“And we know each other?” Cas continued to wrap his head around this. 

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled sardonically. “We’re friends. Close friends. Outside of Sammy in there,” Dean gestured toward the hospital, “You’re the person I’m closest to.”

Cas looked at him, as he did it. That damn head tilt that Dean knew so well. “I am sorry that I do not remember.”

Dean shakes his head. “Not your fault. But,” Dean paused to make sure he had Cas’ full attention. “What got you this way was a trust issue. You didn’t trust me, and you kept things from me. You got in over your head and made some bad decisions. Whenever you do get your memories back? You remember that and you never keep things from me again. Clear?”

Cas nodded. “We’re clear. Though I don’t know if I’ll ever get my memories back. I need some time to think.” 

“Sure,” Dean nodded. “We have another half hour before shift change. Go take a walk." Dean motioned to a nearby field. Cas agreed and walked away towards the field. 

“How long?” Spike asked out of the blue. He had been so quiet Dean had almost forgotten he was there. 

“He been gone?” Dean continued. “Couple of months. Thought he was dead. Don’t know what’s worse--him being dead, or him being alive and not knowing who he is, who I am.”

“Been there, done that,” Spike nodded in understanding. “But that’s not what I meant.”

Dean looked at him puzzled. “Then what _did ___you mean?”

“How long have you been in love with the angel?” Spike looked at him knowingly. 

Dean looked at him in surprise. “What?”

“Oh, please, mate. I’ve been in your shoes. Buffy was dead this summer. Willow, the little red witch you met? She brought her back with a spell. That look you gave Feather-boy over there when you saw him last night? Same look I gave Buffy when she came back. Only one reason a man gets that look in his eye, and it ain’t cause his drinking buddy moved back to town.” Spike explained. 

Dean listened intently as Spike told his story. He never really denied his feelings for Cas. It was pointless. And as far as the “gay” thing, Cas had said in the past that angels were genderless and that he himself was indifferent to gender. Before that Dean had been a little worried when he first started noticing his feelings for Cas. He had even tried transferring them to Anna--until she tried to kill his parents. Then there was Lisa. Neither of those worked too well. So Dean finally took those words of Cas’ to heart. He was just getting around to accepting the feelings himself when Cas went on the God rampage, and then the Leviathans. That’s why Dean had taken Bobby’s death so hard. He never let himself cry when he thought Cas died. So when the floodgates opened for Bobby, they wouldn’t stop. Now that Cas was alive, why deny himself while he was being called out on it? It’s not like there was anything he could do about it anyway, Cas still didn’t remember him, and he wasn’t gonna take advantage of him. 

“Yeah,” Dean whispered. “I love him, but he doesn’t know it. Like even the real him, with his memories and stuff? I never got the chance to tell him before Hell literally broke lose.”

Spike nodded as he listened to Dean speak. “We’re not so different, you and I, other than you being a poofter…”

“Angels don’t have gender, you prick,” Dean joked. 

“I know, mate, I’m just teasing. On a serious note though, if you’ve looked at the real him like that? He’d have to be completely daft to not realize you feel that way.”

Dean smiled, “You’d be surprised how dense that angel can be.”

Suddenly some movement down by the hospital caught his eye and Dean realized shift change was happening. He pointed down the hill just as Cas came back beside them. 

“Showtime.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later in their room, Sam decided he needed to talk to Buffy about what was going on during her therapy session. 

“So, Buff,” he tried to ease into it without setting her off. “How did your therapy go earlier?”

“It was good,” she tried to say, but he could tell she was holding something back.

“But…” he tried to lead her. 

“But that’s the last time I’ll see my parents,” she almost whispered. 

“What do you mean?” This is exactly where Sam wanted the conversation to go. He was pretty concerned after he saw her hugging no one in Dr. Gregory’s office. 

“My dad, he doesn’t visit Sunnydale anymore. He hasn’t been there since I was sixteen. Not even…” she dropped off and gave Sam that look. The one she would get when she started losing tough again. She was about to say something about her life that the doctors told her wasn’t real. 

“Not even when, Buffy,” he asked gently. He didn’t want her to have another episode, but he needed to figure out what was going on with her parents and the doctors. 

“Not even for my mom’s...funeral,” she said nervously. 

“Your mom is dead?” Sam asked as quietly as possible.

“Yes, no, I don’t know, Sam,” Buffy started panicking. “She died in Sunnydale, she had a brain tumor. But she’s here. She comes to visit me and they tell me I make it all up. The divorce. Sunnydale. Dawn. Spike. Is any of it real, Sam? Am I crazy?”

She was a few seconds away from a full on breakdown if Sam didn’t calm her down. 

_May day. May day! ___

“Hey, hey, hey,” Sam rushed to her side. “It’s okay. It’s all real, remember?” He grabbed the bracelet on her wrist. “Everything in Sunnydale is real. Spike’s real, and he’s gonna be here.”

Sam was very confused. Buffy was hallucinating her estranged father and her dead mother? Why had Dr. Gregory said that she was getting better if her hallucinations were this severe. He even looked pleased this afternoon when she was hugging her parents who weren’t there. And what was causing Buffy to have these hallucinations? Other than during a breakdown, Buffy was always completely lucid, no indications of any instability. Something just wasn’t adding up for Sam, and for some reason he felt like Dr. Eli Gregory was right in the middle of it. 

“Are you sure?” She asked, still a little shaken. 

“Positive,” Sam nodded. He glanced up at the clock on the wall. “In fact, he should be here in just a few minutes.” 

He’d have to worry about Dr. Gregory after Dean got here and he had some back up. 

_Ooh, goody. Showtime. ___

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Dean,” Cas said, “those guards? They have faces like the man at the house.”

“Demons?” Dean supplied. Cas nodded. “Awesome. Well, between the three of us I think we’ll be fine.”

Spike was actually rubbing his hands together in delight. “I could use a good rough and tumble, anyway, after all this stress.”

Dean nodded as they approached the guards who had already recognized Cas and him. “Good, because it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.”

Then they jumped right into the fight. Spike and Dean fought as a perfect team, both being seasoned fighters. They were taking out demons one by one as Cas stood back watching it all happen. He wasn’t yet sure how to go about fighting these monsters, but something seemed eerily familiar about the whole scene. 

There were only three demons left. Spike was taking on two while Dean had one more. Suddenly, Dean’s demon seemed to have somehow obtained the upper hand. He was standing over Dean, who was on the ground. Spike was still distracted with his last demon, and didn’t notice Dean’s distress. Cas finally jumped into the breach. 

He stepped behind the demon and simply touched his head, much like he did back at his...no Emmanuel’s house. Immediately, the demon fell to the ground with his eyes burned out. Then he was looking down at Dean...who was looking up at him. 

Visions of Heaven, Hell, and Earth all flooded his mind, visions of this man. The Righteous man. All the things they had done together. Pulling him from Hell. Putting him back together in Heaven. Bringing him back to Earth and having to forge their friendship once again. The adventures that that entailed. Growing close again. Then when he betrayed his Righteous Man. 

The man looking up at him now. But his eyes didn’t have the hurt of betrayal as they should have. They held forgiveness, peace, hope, and...affection? 

“Dean,” he said looking as mournful as Dean had ever seen him.

“Cas?” Dean asked nervously.

“I remember,” Cas said as he fell to his knees. “I remember it all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up with the doctor?
> 
> Comments?
> 
> Kudos?
> 
> Tales of Woe?


	6. I Wanna Be Sedated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas is back! Time to rescue Sam and Buffy...but is anything ever really that easy?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally planned for this chapter to be longer, but I've hit a bit of a block. I'm participating in NaNoWriMo next month so all of my writing energy is going to be put there, so I thought I would give you guys this much to hold you over until December when I hopefully have more of the story.

Dean immediately rushed to kneel in front of Cas and take him in his arms. 

 

“Dean...I...the Leviathans!” Cas was shouting frantically. “What have I done?”

 

“Hey, shh, shh, it’s ok,” Dean tried to calm him as he rubbed his back. “We’re gonna figure it out.” He grabbed Cas’ face and pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. “We’ll fix it like we always do. But right now, we gotta help Sammy. Can you do that, Cas?”

 

Cas looked at him worriedly. Then Spike, who had been standing back to let them have their moment, spoke up. 

 

“Not to spoil this happy reunion, but I’m trying to have one of my own. The fact that the entire day staff were of the demonic persuasion doesn’t bode well for our loved ones on the inside.”

 

Cas nodded. “He’s right. I can do this.”

 

“Are you sure?” Dean prodded. He wanted Sammy back and sane again, but he also didn’t want to lose Cas again as soon as he got him back. 

 

“I’m sure,” Cas said confidently as he moved Dean for both of them to stand. Dean’s hands dropped from his face, but Cas placed his hand on Dean’s shoulder where his handprint used to be. “I’m going to fix Sam.”

 

Dean nodded, “Okay, then. Let’s do this!”

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

“Treatment time!” A new, female orderly announced as she stepped into Sam and Buffy’s room. 

 

“What do you mean?” Sam asked. Usually after shift change there was nothing left to do for the night except settle in for lights out. There was never any sort of treatments at this hour. 

 

“We already took our medicine,” Buffy offered.

 

The orderly simply shook her head while smiling. “New regimen for both of you--Dr. Gregory’s orders.”

 

“Why are we starting a treatment at night?” Buffy asked. “Can’t it wait until tomorrow?” 

 

_“After Spike breaks me out of here,”_ she thought.

 

“Because you’ve already taken the adrenaline dampeners and muscle relaxers for the night,” the orderly explained as her smile turned into an evil smirk. “Means you can’t fight back.”

 

_Uh-oh,_ Lucifer said as he stood next to the orderly, studying her face. _Hey, Sammy, I think she’s one of mine._ He said with a smile on his face. Then, she blinked and showed her black eyes. 

 

As soon as the words were out of Lucifer’s mouth, the orderly punched Buffy in the face, effectively knocking her out in her weakened state. 

 

_Well, that’s disappointing...Slayer and all._

 

Sam tried to brace himself for a fight, but before he could make a move the demon had his arm twisted behind his back. She licked up his neck, then spoke. 

 

“Nuh uh, Winchester, you’re on the same dampeners as her. No matter how hard you fight,” another demon entered the room and started strapping Buffy onto a gurney. “You’ll lose.”

 

_Where’s big brother, now?_ Lucifer said before the other demon knocked Sam out. 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Dean led Spike and Cas to Sam and Buffy’s room with his hand in the small of Cas’ back and Spike following close behind. He was already on edge because the only staff they had run into on the inside were also demons. They were wasted easily, but it didn’t bode well for Sam and Buffy to be surrounded by demons. Keeping physical contact of some kind with Cas was the only thing holding him together. 

 

Just as he feared, when they arrived to the room they found it empty. The upturned chair in the middle of the room was a clear sign of a struggle. Spike walked into the room and growled deep in his throat. 

 

“I can smell Buffy’s blood,” he sneered. “Something's about to die a painful death.” 

 

“Can you track it?” Dean wondered. He had forgotten about vampires’ strong sense of smell. 

 

Suddenly, they heard what was clearly a woman’s scream. Then Spike roared. 

 

And they were running.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Sam came to, only to find he and Buffy were both strapped down to gurneys. Buffy’s face was covered in blood as a result of the demon punching her; her nose was probably broken. Sam could tell she was having a panic attack by the way she was squirming in her bindings and whining. 

 

“Hey,” Sam said to let her know he was awake now. 

 

“Sam!” she exclaimed. “The entire hospital is full of demons! The staff, the other patients, and Dr. Gregory! It’s all a prison for us!” She told him frantically. 

 

“Why us?” Sam wondered out loud. 

 

“I’m glad you asked,” Dr. Gregory walked into the room. He blinked his black eyes for a moment, then returned them to normal. He stepped between their beds so that he would be able to look at both of them as he spoke. 

 

“You see,” he began. “I was originally contracted by Mr. Roman to run this facility for you, Sam.”

 

“Dick Roman?” Sam asked in shock.

 

“Yes, he wanted you out of the way for his plans he has next month and this was the perfect opportunity.” He explained. 

 

“What plans?” Sam asked worriedly. 

 

“Don’t know,” Dr. Gregory shrugged. “Don’t care. My job was to keep you here and screwed up. The fact that the Slayer landed here was just a happy bonus.” He giggled. “Can you imagine the street cred I’ll get for taking out Lucifer’s vessel--a Winchester--and a Slayer all at the same time?”

 

_My vessel is right! How dare you! Why if I ever get topside again!_

 

“How did you get her?” Sam prodded. He was slowly working his way out of his restraints and wanted to keep the “doctor” talking so he was distracted. 

 

“Little nerd figured out how to get ahold of me. Said he needed the Slayer out of his hair. I told him if he could get her here, I’d keep her here.”

 

“How?” Buffy finally spoke up. “How did you drive me insane? Make me see my parents? My mother is dead, you son of a bitch!”

 

He snickered. “Demon, bitch. I have access to magic you’ve only dreamed about. And the drugs my guys stole from your precious Watcher’s Council? Works wonders on that pesky super strength of yours.” He turned to Sam. 

 

“Then, there’s you. Sam Winchester. Azazel’s favorite psychic child. True vessel to the big man downstairs. Not to mention all the hype you cause just for that last name. You showed up already two weeks shy of being Norman Bates himself. All I had to do to you was keep you on the same dampeners as her to kill your will to fight while still pretending you had hope. Then you were putty in my hand.”

 

Sam was almost done getting one of his hand restraints off when the female demon from earlier suddenly was at his side and tightening it again. 

 

“Nuh, uh, uh, Sam,” she smiled. “No breaking the rules.” She walked to a machine and put headgears on him and Buffy. Then she turned to Dr. Gregory. “Should I start now?”

 

“Sure, give them a small dose,” he nodded. 

 

The “small” dose was a bolt of electricity that would have knocked Sam to the ground if he wasn’t already strapped to the bed. He heard Buffy scream. Then all he could see was Lucifer. 

 

_Well, other than that arrogant little dog I’ll eventually have to deal with, this has been quite fun. That little bolt was like drinking a Red Bull! Now I’m all hyper! What should I do with all of this energy, Sammy?_ Lucifer smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review!!


	7. Wake Me Up, When September Ends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Buffy and Sam get rescued by Dean, Spike and Cas. Then they have a long ride home where lots of fun conversations ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What?!!! I'm updating?? No way!! Well, one of my friends wouldn't get off my back, so I finally wrote this chapter. It's kinda choppy I know, but you guys know that I am better at dialogue than descriptions anyway. Also, there was supposed to be a fight scene in this chapter, but you will see how I chickened out of writing that as well. 
> 
> Anyways, enjoy!

After the “small” dose of electricity hit Sam’s system he wasn’t sure what was real or not...but it’s not like that was anything new. He was pretty sure that he passed out for a few minutes. When he finally came to, he was pretty sure that he saw Dean and Sid Vicious fighting against the demons. And was that...Cas? No, now he was sure that Lucifer was messing with him. 

_Much as I love your confidence in me, Sammy, that is not my doing. The little do-gooder is really here._

“But how?” Before he could get the words out, Dean was suddenly standing over him. 

“Don’t worry, Sammy, we’re here to get you out,” as he was talking he was undoing the the straps that were holding Sam to the table. 

“Where’s Buffy?” Sam asked as he sat up. 

Dean looked around until he saw Spike was still fighting with the demon that appeared to be in charge. Dean had wasted the girl almost as soon as they got in the room. Finally, he found Buffy, still strapped to a table, but with Cas standing over her trying to untie her. 

“She’s taken care of, Sam,” Dean instantly reassured Sam. “Stay here for a second while I go help Buffy’s boyfriend with this other demon.”

“Dean,” Sam called before Dean got out of range, he instantly gave Sam his full attention. “He made Buffy crazy, someone transported her here with magic, but that demon is the one that made her feel like she needed to be here.”

Dean nodded and continued to go help the bleached vampire. Sam saw them work together to get Dr. Gregory down before Dean spoke to the other man and stepped back to let him viciously attack the demon. 

“Spike!” Buffy yelled once Cas had successfully freed her from her bonds. 

Immediately he stopped tearing the demon apart and ran to Buffy, wrapping her in his arms tightly. Neither of them said a word, and the other three let them have their moment. 

Dean and Cas both made their way to Sam. 

“Cas?” Sam asked incredulously. “How?”

“None of us are really clear on that yet, Sam,” Dean answered for Cas. “Let’s all just be happy that he’s here.”

Sam nodded in agreement, and Cas smiled. Then he looked to Sam. 

“I can fix your mind,” Cas offered. “For good this time.”

“How are you going to do that?” Sam asked. 

Cas smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I am going to transfer the damage that Lucifer did to your brain to my own. It will still be bad for me for awhile, but I will heal, whereas you never will without my help.”

Dean shook his head. “There’s got to be another way. Cas, I...we just got you back. We need you in tip top shape. I want Sam healed too, but not at the expense of you.” 

“Dean’s right,” Sam rushed to agree. 

“This is the only way,” Cas said as he shook his head. “Dean, I know I will be useful to you, but not as useful as Sam will be at his full capacity. Besides, my powers will still work, I will simply be less than efficient in my mental faculties.” 

“Cas, you can’t,” Dean still tried to reason with his angel. But he wasn’t fast enough. Cas touched Sam’s head and then he screamed so loud it made Dean’s gut wrench. Dean rushed to catch him before he fell, and that was it. Cas had passed out. 

“Damnit, Cas!” Dean yelled as he held Cas. 

Spike and Buffy had rushed over at the sound of Cas’ scream. 

“What happened?” Buffy asked Sam. 

“My friend,” Sam said brokenly. “He’s an angel.”

“I know,” Buffy nodded. “He told me, and then he healed me from whatever magic or drugs they were giving me here.”

“Right,” Sam said. “Well, he healed me, too. But he really just transferred my problems onto himself and I guess it was too much for him to handle right now.”

Spike bent down beside where Dean was sitting on the ground holding Cas. “Winchester? We need to get out of here before we find out if these nasties had any friends that will come looking for them.” 

Dean took a deep breath and nodded. “You’re right. Can you carry him?”

Spike nodded and picked Cas up gently as they all headed outside to find a getaway car. It didn’t take them long to find a stereotypical “creeper” van. Spike laid Cas down gently in the floor in the back before he and Buffy got in the back to sit up against the doors. That left Dean to get in the driver seat with Sam riding shotgun. Dean looked down at Cas one last time before he put the van in gear and drove away. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later, after they had been on the road for awhile, Spike and Buffy finally had the chance to talk. 

“I’m so sorry about our fight, Spike,” Buffy said with a small voice and she cuddled into Spike’s side. 

“No, Slayer,” he shook his head. “It was my fault. I should have just been happy with the fact that you told the Bit. She’s all that matters anyway.” 

“But I should have told them. I mean, who are they to judge me? Oz was a werewolf, and Anya was a demon for way longer than you’ve been around as a human or a vampire!” She argued. 

“Good point,” Spike nodded in agreement. “But you still don’t have to tell them until you are ready.”

“Well, I’m ready now,” She said determined. “Keeping secrets is exhausting, and this year has been hectic enough on its own without us adding more to it.”

“Alright, Slayer,” Spike smiled. “If that’s what you want.”

They leaned back against the doors and tried to sleep for the rest of the trip. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the front seat Dean and Sam were having their own conversation. 

“Dean,” Sam said. When he noticed he had Dean’s attention he continued. “Thanks.”

“No thanks needed, Sammy.” Dean shook his head. “I’ll always come for you. You know that.”

“Yeah,” Sam chuckled. He looked back at Cas who was sleeping with a tortured look on his face. “How do you think he’s doing?”

Dean’s expression suddenly got sadder. “I don’t know, Sam. I guess we just wait until he wakes up and hope for the best.”

Sam nodded. “How did you even find him?”

“The faith healer that Buffy’s little Red Hot friend found online? It was Cas all along. He had absolutely no memory of who he was or what was going on around him. He was living a perfectly normal little life. Wife and everything. Spike and me loaded him up in the car while I explained everything about who he was. We came to rescue you guys and there were demons outside. He killed one that was about to get to me, and all of a sudden all of his memories came flooding back. He was himself for 5 whole minutes before he went and screwed his head all up again.” Dean told Sam. 

“Dean,” Sam breathed. “I am so sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about, Sammy,” Dean shook his head. “Cas knew what he was doing, and I’m glad to have you back to normal.”

“No,” Sam corrected. “Not about that, I mean yes about that. But that’s not what I meant.”

Dean looked at Sam puzzled. 

“I meant I’m sorry you had to go through that. Cas looking at you and not having any idea who you were must have killed you inside.” Sam explained. 

“Sam, this is rapidly becoming a chick flick moment, and I do not know if I can take it after the day I’ve had.” Dean warned. 

Sam rolled his eyes. “Dean, will you just accept some comfort?” 

Dean softened. “Yeah, you’re right. Him looking at me like that? It was torture. And trust me, I’ve been tortured by the best of them. But nothing I experienced in Hell even came close to the way it made me feel looking into his eyes and seeing nothing stare back. Me and Cas...we’ve always had a connection, you know?”

“Oh, believe me, I know,” Sam teased. 

“You do?” Dean asked surprised.

Sam perfectly executed bitch face #318 and scoffed. “Please, Dean. I’ve seen you lust after women. I’ve seen you love Cassie and Lisa. Hell, Dean, your siren was a man. I’m not blind Dean. I know what you look like when you’re in love. And you’ve never loved anyone the way you love Cas.”

Dean slowly digested the fact that there was nothing to confess to Sam because he already knew it all. 

“So of course in the infinite planning of the universe,” Dean began. “I finally own up to my own feelings and am ready to confess it all to Cas when he decides to go and do something stupid and fry his brains out.” 

“You didn’t tell him?” Sam asked shocked. 

“When would I have told him, Sam?” Dean almost yelled. “He had his memories back and we were gone to save you. I was going to wait. Get you and Buffy saved. Take Buffy and Spike back to Sunnydale. Check into a motel room there and get us two rooms, one for you and one for us. I was going to do it right, damnit. So of course it all had to fall to shit. Now I don’t know what I’m going to do. Hell, I don’t know if he’s even going to wake up!”

That effectively dropped the conversation. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They drove in silence for a few hours until they crossed the California state line. Buffy and Spike woke up after that. They gently moved Cas further to the back of the van so that they could talk to the brothers without disturbing the angel. 

“Sam,” Buffy started. “Why would Dick Roman, the guy who’s running for president of the United States, be worried about you?”

“Dick Roman?” Dean and Spike said in unison.

“What the hell does he have to do with this?” Dean asked Sam. 

“Apparently that’s why the hospital was full of demons,” Sam explained. “It was essentially a prison to keep me tied up until Dick finishes whatever crazy plan he’s got worked up.”

“How the bloody hell did the Slayer get wrapped up in a prison for you?” Spike asked angrily.

“The nerds,” Buffy said flatly, as if that was all that needed to be said. Spike nodded his head and seethed. 

“Nerds?” Dean asked amused. 

“Oh no you don’t, Hot Rod,” Spike chided. “My girl’s question first. What’s your connection to the most powerful man in the country?”

Dean went on to explain everything that had went on the last year. Cas freeing the Leviathans from Purgatory on accident, Cas exploding as the Leviathans escaped. How the Leviathans can imitate anyone they want with just a touch of DNA, how to kill them. And finally, how Dick Roman himself was now a Leviathan. 

“Wow,” Buffy said after the whole story finally set in. “The most powerful politician I ever dealt with was just the mayor of Sunnydale. You have to take on the future president of the United States.”

“Good luck with that,” Spike said. Then, Buffy smacked him in the arm.

“Ow!” Spike jumped. “Uh, what I mean to say gents, is that the Slayer and I will be happy to help you whenever the big showdown takes place.” 

“Right,” Dean smirked as he teased Spike about being whipped. 

“Now, uh,” Sam prodded. “Nerds?”

Buffy sighed in exasperation. “Three absolute dweebs that I used to go to highschool with have been causing all sorts of trouble all year. I mean, they’re human so I can’t kill them.” 

“Spike can,” Dean offered jokingly.

“Well,” Spike started. “About that…”

 

“Spike has a behavior modification chip in his brain that makes it where he can’t harm humans,” Buffy told the brothers. “And they know about the chip so he can’t even scare them because they know he can’t hurt them.”

“So why don’t you just take the chip out of Spike’s head?” Dean asked. 

There it was. The question that Spike was sure would start another fight between him and the Slayer. They had just gotten good again, too. Oh well, maybe just this once he could hold in the anger and hurt when she talked about how she didn’t trust him without it. 

“He tried to get it out once,” Buffy answered. “But the guy never finished. And I don’t know anyone else that could do a brain surgery like that without damaging something important, you know?” 

Well that was surprising. She almost sounded...accepting of the idea of him not having a chip in the first place. Oh well, was probably just a front for the new kids. 

“Well if Cas…” Sam started and paused. “I mean when Cas wakes up, we could see if he could just take it out.”

And here we go. Now she was confronted with the possibility of it really being taken out. Backpedal in 3...2...1…

“But what if he doesn’t wake up before you guys want to leave Sunnydale?” Buffy asked so perfectly Spike almost believed she was really concerned with the possibility. 

“We’ll probably stay in town until he does if that’s alright with you,” Dean shrugged. “I can’t travel with him like this. I’ll be too worried about him to focus on anything that might come after us.” 

“Sounds good to me,” Buffy accepted. “Spike could use you guys’ help on patrol until I get my bearings back from that horrible experience.” 

“Great,” Dean smiled. “Until then, I can play brain surgeon on Fang Boy! I mean, it’s not like he’s gonna bleed to death. And if I touch something wrong, he’ll heal...or Cas can heal him when he wakes up.”

Buffy chuckled. “My friend Tara is all into the healing magic stuff. I’ll have her look into some spells that might help before you go playing Operation on my boyfriend’s brain, thank you.” 

“Really?” Spike asked incredulously. “You’re going to have Glenda try to remove the chip?”

“Sure,” Buffy shrugged nonchalantly, like she wasn’t changing Spike’s whole world with this topic of discussion. 

“You trust me enough to live without the chip?” He asked in awe. 

“Spike,” she looked at him to get his full attention. “The chip stopped working on me months ago, and you haven’t hurt me. And I know you would never hurt Dawn, Tara, or Anya. You and Xander could be great friends if you guys would just get over yourselves. And Willow can take care of herself.”

“Wait,” Dean butted in before the conversation got way too gooey for his tastes. “Why doesn’t the chip work on you?”

“I died.” Buffy answered chipperly. 

“Cool,” Dean smiled. “How many times?”

“Twice,” Buffy grinned at him in the mirror. 

“Pft, amateaur.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well??? What do ya think??

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think! Comments, kudos, anything!


End file.
